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Jack Sparrow

Carb Poisoning

Posted on 2008.01.29 at 09:54
Current Location: 75070
Current Music: Brightman - Classics
Tags:

Since receiving approximately $800 worth of baked good, my body is going into shock due to all the carb-loading. I haven't ingested this much refined sugar in a good long time. My eyes are ceaselessly bloodshot, I'm having trouble sleeping, and my synapses are mis-firing. Once we pull ourselves out of this post-tax month, I'm sure I'll be able to start self-regulating once again.

No thank you, I do not want another doughnut.

I dislike unsolicited offers. They generally reek of impropriety. And while I've unfortunately grown accustomed to their occurrence with the rest of America (And please, what's the point of a pop-under, where they disappear behind your browser so you can't see them? Isn't that the opposite of advertising? Dumbasses.) There are certain places I expect to be hijacked, and certain places I don't. My bank, for example. I don't anticipate unsolicited offers from them. I was at the drive-through this morning making a deposit, and in the middle of my transaction the lady on the other ends asks, "Sir, because [your bank] appreciates your business, you've been pre-approved for a Visa credit card. Are you interested?"

Excuse me?

I told her she sounded like a web page pop-up. I didn't mean it as a compliment, but she laughed and laughed. The asked me, "Seriously, are you interested?"

Not even accidentally.

Lastly, the Man for his Time brought me a shiny Mac Mini (minus the overclocked CPU) to replace mine that Leopard destroyed. How sweet is that? He wasn't using it and knew I'd blown mine up. I was giddy with anticipation and booted into Leopard last night! I cannot explain the rush of seeing Aqua again, and knowing I'd never have to use XP again. Searching in OSX is even easier than in unix, navigation isn't forced or unwieldy. The layout is inviting and comfortable. I'm more productive on my mac.

Twenty minutes later, it crashed.

In comparing the output from crash dumps, something is causing a CPU panic. While I'd assumed the unretouched CPU would solve my issue, I'm hoping a re-installation will clear this up. I'm getting antsy. AND...provided I get my old mac working...I'm considering putting Ubuntu on it and moving it to my wife's desk so she can have her own computer too. Too bad these old mac's don't have built-in wireless.

Tried to cancel my DirecTV:

Howdy! Your website is very impressive, and just short of exhaustive. Unfortunately, I couldn't find a link to cancel my subscription. Furthermore, your automated phone system is close to useless, as I can't seem to successfully navigate it to a real, live person - and there's not an automated, "Press [number] to cancel your service" option.

Here's to hoping this method gets some results:

PLEASE CANCEL MY SERVICE IMMEDIATELY.


Thank you,

Eric Howton


Dear Mr. Howton,

Thanks for writing in about your DIRECTV service. You've been with DIRECTV since February 2006 and we want you to know we value your business. I'm sorry to hear that you had difficulties trying to reach a DIRECTV representative over the phone. Customers don't usually have trouble getting through to us, but you may have called during a period of unusually high call volume. I also apologize if you were not able to cancel your DIRECTV service online. I understand your frustration and I apologize for the inconvenience these issues have caused you. Let me help you with your concerns.

While we encourage customers to use our website for many common tasks relating to their DIRECTV service, some functions and requests are handled by our agents and our automated systems. As of this time, however, the option to cancel your service online is not yet available.

Moving on, at DIRECTV, every customer is important to us. We’d like to speak with you before you disconnect your account, so we’ve set up a special phone line with a PIN number that you can use to reach our team directly.

Please call us at 800-824-9081 between 6:05 am and 1:00 am ET daily. When the system asks for a Personal ID Number (PIN), enter 0000 (this PIN is good for five days). We’re looking forward to talking to you!

Thanks again for writing and giving us the opportunity to respond to your concerns.




Yes I called them, yes it was a nightmare, yes I was on hold for nearly an hour on and off, and yes, they were very aggressive about not cancelling my service without good reason. I nearly hung up on them twice. Alas, to put myself willingly through this again is something I could not do. I persevered.

It cost me $50.

Fuckers.

Comments:


catttitude
catttitude at 2008-01-29 21:12 (UTC) (Link)
$50.00 + this months fee? Maybe we should have tried to just cancel their access to our bank account. Dam St. Louis contracts, probably has something to do with the Mafia.
ehowton
ehowton at 2008-01-29 21:15 (UTC) (Link)
First they said we weren't out of our contract until the middle of 2009. Then later, someone else comes on and tells me we're not out of our contract until May of this year. (We thought it was January). So its $50 total (as we're paid up) for the cancellation fee.

Well, that's what I was told, and we know how that goes...
galinda822 at 2008-01-29 21:30 (UTC) (Link)
Carbs are bad!
ehowton
ehowton at 2008-01-29 21:35 (UTC) (Link)
I gotta down a Monster drink at night just to sleep!
Me
photogoot at 2008-01-30 00:41 (UTC) (Link)
Please tell me the precise time schpydurx makes the comment about how crazy it is that their PIN is 0000. ;-)

You know he will...
ehowton
ehowton at 2008-01-30 00:49 (UTC) (Link)
Obfuscation is scary.

http://ehowton.livejournal.com/163537.html?thread=3898833#t3898833



Edited at 2008-01-30 12:58 am (UTC)
Me
photogoot at 2008-01-30 03:01 (UTC) (Link)
I don't like change. Change is different. Change agitates me.
ehowton
ehowton at 2008-01-30 03:03 (UTC) (Link)
Sorry - you weren't supposed to see that. Think of it more as a work in progress.
irulan_amy at 2008-01-30 05:14 (UTC) (Link)
Damn their eyes. That's obnoxious.

Precisely why I always like to have a cancel online option. This way they can't practically yell at you about canceling your service. Wait...maybe they like that part.
danzigfried at 2008-01-30 23:15 (UTC) (Link)
God bless Yoda and his generosity!! *sniff
ehowton
ehowton at 2008-01-30 23:45 (UTC) (Link)
Little midget bastard.
Me
photogoot at 2008-01-31 05:15 (UTC) (Link)
*TAP* *TAP*

You call this progress? spend the 5 bucks already! :-)
ehowton
ehowton at 2008-01-31 05:18 (UTC) (Link)
Your avatar coupled with the impatience you emote makes me giggle.

I may be going in another direction altogether. Do you like purple?
snapper521 at 2008-01-31 20:01 (UTC) (Link)

Ridiculous difficulties in cancelation

Whoa... that is absolutely ridiculous!!

I have heard of others having difficulty canceling their service through other nationwide service providers though. Can't remember any specific examples, but I do remember hearing it though.
Renegade
leonardii at 2008-02-01 05:08 (UTC) (Link)
Hoorah for persecution, er - I mean... perseverance!
ehowton
ehowton at 2008-02-02 00:22 (UTC) (Link)
I regret to inform you that I will be unable to attend the birthday party as it conflicts with my son's. Please, enjoy yourself, and tell everyone I said, "Hello." Thank you.
Renegade
leonardii at 2008-02-01 05:13 (UTC) (Link)
Oh, just wanted to say thanks for sending some emails to Lena. she can receive fine from any other account except mine.

I have no idea where to begin to resolve this issue. Perhaps it an unexplained mystery with Outlook Express. We shall see when we get out tax returns, buy her another system, and get her using Thunderbird again. She never had any trouble receiving my mail there. I use T-bird myself. Weird. Just really weird.

But, I do appreciate you taking some time out of your day to help me experiment on the problem. I wish I could say I was closer to a solution - but I'm just not there yet.

My theory - just blame it on Outlook Express. Once she gets her T-bird account up and running, I'm sure the mysterious errors will most like go the way of the Dodo.

Lena also said thanks - but the gobbled randomized email you sent really left her confused. I laughed - told her what we were trying to do - and she understood. Mostly.

Point is - I'm just saying thanks, buddy. :)
ehowton
ehowton at 2008-02-01 14:19 (UTC) (Link)
Note to self: Tell wife plans of having buddies send emails full of randomly generated text to her prior to them actually doing it.
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