November 14th, 2006

Retarded

Like Trying to Explain the Theory of Relativity to a Talking Donkey

It starts out a friendly conversation amongst friends...

ProfessorTom: What, praytell, does photogoot do for a living?
EricHowton: He's a Program Manager.
ProfessorTom: what exactly does that title entail?
ProfessorTom: what exactly does a program manager do besides manage?
EricHowton: He's in charge of the Project Managers.
ProfessorTom: what do they do?
EricHowton: Oversee the various lines of service to ensure a project has what it needs to meet the customer's expectations usually.

Here's the question the first time:

ProfessorTom: so he's a programmer, but on the management side of it?
EricHowton: A Program Manager is usually more political and less hands on than a project manager.
EricHowton: No programming involved.

Here's the question a second time:

ProfessorTom: but he does/can/did program?
EricHowton: No. There is no programming involved in a Program Management position.

Clear?

ProfessorTom: I understand that

Fantastic!

ProfessorTom: how did he work his way up to that position?
EricHowton: He was hired off the street and skyrocketed to that position based on his boyish good-looks and innate charm.
ProfessorTom: I see

Wait a tic, wots this?

ProfessorTom: so he never programmed professionally?

Uh...

EricHowton: THERE IS NO PROGRAMMING INVOLVED!!!!! The word PROGRAM in this case refers to a HUGE event (usually outsourcing) which encompasses many smaller projects.

We're good now, right?

ProfessorTom: I need either a "yes" or "no" answer to this question
ProfessorTom: Are you retarded?
EricHowton: Yes. I have many faults. One of them is trying to convey new ideas to you.
EricHowton: I should give that up, as I usually just end up repeating myself!
ProfessorTom: thank you. now I know you are not illeterate but rather retarded.
ProfessorTom: I understand there is no programming involved.
EricHowton: NO YOU DON'T!
EricHowton: Because you keep asking me.

WTF?

ProfessorTom: my question was did he ever program professionally?

Collapse )
EricHowton: Please stop asking if he programs, professionally or otherwise.
EricHowton: Please?
EricHowton: You know what, he's not a Program Manager.
EricHowton: He's unemployed.

Collapse )
EricHowton: I want you to die.



Well, consensus shows that I was the only one who thought this was funny. Yes, I know what he was really asking, but I couldn't help myself.

And I apologize for freezing everyone's comments, but someone began systematically deleting their comments throwing the thread off.
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