December 19th, 2014


Real Life Assumptions

I had a new friend recently block me on Facebook. I only discovered he blocked me when someone else acknowledged him by name - a name which was no longer accessible to me. Last I'd heard, he'd temporarily disabled his account while he was on vacation; to avoid unnecessary distractions. To say the least, I was shocked at this discovery, as we'd been communicating very well up to that point, and I considered him a friend.

I was rather disappointed.

My first thought was to send a preemptive apology. I must have said something which caused him to block me and just go on with his life without comment. What could it have been? My mind was suddenly abuzz with past conversations and possible misunderstandings. But something stopped me from sending that email - everything I'd concocted was based upon assumption.

Realizing my reaction was the very thing I rail against, I resisted - despite not being able to come up with any other explanations for my friend's behavior. I had *just* written my Silent Killer post and here I was ready to form an opinion and take action on an assumption. The idea isn't to not have them - we all do - the idea is to not let them control us. Even though I couldn't think of any other reason to have been blocked, I consciously decided to wait it out with an open mind. Difficult to be sure, but nothing was going to be solved by acting on impulse.

Several days later I got an email from my friend who's phone had died while on vacation, and upon returning home had decided to embrace a less-distracted life without Facebook, deleting all his contacts except immediate family with which Facebook was his only means of communication. He decided he would simply email his small circle of closest friends, of which I was now a part of.

Being aware of how assumption can alter reality saved me the embarrassment of later apologizing for my irrational thoughts, and now I have a new data-point for future issues which will no doubt arise.

* Originally posted to