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Eric

A poem entirely from the script of Galaxy Quest

Posted on 2008.11.12 at 09:11
Current Location: 75070
Current Music: Mozart - Requiem
Tags:
Commander, welcome to the Protector II
They designed those controls after watching you
Young Laredo, how you've grown
Petal to the metal, you deserve to be shown

What are you, an infant? Look. We have these.
Yes, We wish to go to the ship, you see.
No pressure, huh? Glad I ain’t the Commander.
"Take us out." Never surrender

By Grabthar's Hammer, you shall be avenged
These weren’t just adventurers exploring space, these were friends
I was an actor once, five curtain calls
Usually it's just cardboard walls

Wow, the floors are really clean
C'mon, group hug, you guys were right again
We're just here to negotiate this guy Sarris' surrender
Look, this thingy...I remember!

Contrary to reality?
The enemy is matching velocity.
Six paragraphs about my boobs
Kep-mok bloodticks - we programmed the food

You're quite complicated, sir
Could they be the miners? Sure.
Re-configure the solar matrix in parallel for endothermic propulsion
Fred, we need a diversion

That's funny coming from the guy that slept with every Moon Princess
The Beryllium Sphere has fractured under stress
Is there a replacement beryllium sphere on board?
I remember I had it all worked out, this was forward

A Beryllium Sphere of sufficient density.
Must be some sort of mining facility.
You were holding it upside down weren't you?
Its not the ship’s fault, We screwed -

Does the rolling help? Where's your gun?
I remember you, what's your name, son?
Kyle, we have a level five emergency.
I have raised Sarris on zeta frequency.

You wanna take a left then just straight on through the chompers.
That’s not too bad. We’ll get you to the medical quarters
Whoever wrote this episode should die!
No. Nobody does. Do you know why?

Digitize me, Fred
Whoo! Full speed ahead
87% damage...Left vector
The crew of the NSEA Protector!



Comments:


Melancthe the Woe, So-Called
melancthe at 2008-11-12 15:42 (UTC) (Link)
You did it! I'm beyond amused.
ehowton
ehowton at 2008-11-12 18:34 (UTC) (Link)
Thank you. I'm glad you liked it.
galinda822 at 2008-11-12 16:35 (UTC) (Link)
I'm going to rest my eyes for a moment. But go on. I am listening...
ehowton
ehowton at 2008-11-12 18:33 (UTC) (Link)
Uh-huh, I know what that means!

I shout at you as if I were Laliari with a broken translator!

hiro_antagonist at 2008-11-12 17:58 (UTC) (Link)
Brilliance or madness, I am unsure.

Fascinating?

Without question.
ehowton
ehowton at 2008-11-12 18:22 (UTC) (Link)
I know exactly what you mean.

Thanks.
catttitude
catttitude at 2008-11-12 18:21 (UTC) (Link)
To long to read. Any cliff notes?
ehowton
ehowton at 2008-11-12 18:22 (UTC) (Link)
That was the Cliff's Notes.
Joshua Gizelt
swashbuckler332 at 2008-11-12 22:40 (UTC) (Link)
See, that's your problem, Eric. You were never serious about the craft.
ehowton
ehowton at 2008-11-12 23:12 (UTC) (Link)
You used to pull your punches.
Joshua Gizelt
swashbuckler332 at 2008-11-12 23:21 (UTC) (Link)
It's "Scene-Stealing Hack," thank you.
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