ehowton (ehowton) wrote,
ehowton
ehowton

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The Charred Heart


I wrote this poem back in May as a parody to some poetry a creepy stalker was sending to someone on my friends list, basing it off his stanza "your heart; charred of tenderness; like fragile meat left too long on a grill..."

Your heart
That beating organ in your chest
I'll crack you open
And dispose of the rest

My grill
White hot coals waiting
Your heart sizzles
I'm salivating

Marinate
With hand-rubbed spice
Finger your aorta
I hate my life

Sitting
With steak knife in hand
Succulent meat
Stike up the band!

Remorse
I'm such a cannibalistic slut
If I can't have your love
You'll disgest in my gut.


It was well received and we laugh about it to this day. Yesterday, I mentioned that I was going to be grilling burgers. "Charred heart burgers?" was the reply.

I used to spend a lot of time making my own patties. I always started with ground sirloin and added my own spices. From a trick I learned from my father I would place the ball of meat between sheets of wax paper and flatten them using two heavy plates for a perfectly round disc of meat. But that was a lot of work. We were at Sam's Club several years ago trying to think of menu items for my inlaw's visit when I spied a box of 12 pre-formed 100% Angus beef patties for something like $13. What a deal! And so easy too! I've been buying them ever since.

We haven't been grocery shopping in a week or so in preparation for the kids being out-of-state over the holidays, and we're running low on supplies. My wife suggested hamburgers. I went to our local, small-town grocery store and discovered they only had non-Angus patties. Oh well, it was that or I was making them by hand. So, against my better judgment, I bought them and brought them home.

Later, when I pulled them out of the freezer to open them, I was horrified at what I saw, and the memory of the question I was asked earlier haunted me!



"Charred heart burgers?"

Tags: poem
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