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The Rehabilitaion Cube

Posted on 2009.01.15 at 12:00
Current Location: 75070
Current Music: The Beach Soundtrack / Go: The Very Best of Moby
Tags: ,

I hereby sentence danzigfried to the Rehabilitation Cube:

52-second clip

I was up until 0130 last night trying to get drax0r's web server to stream flash video. Once I perfect this, I will pull my clips from YouTube and replace them with full-length clips of my ass. The clip in this post was going to be my triumphant success, but I didn't *actually* get the embed to work until I was at work, and then only on a similarly configured box as my one at home - remember I was denied access to my box recently, and my Air Card is in drax0r's coat pocket. Wouldn't matter though, as I still have some ffmpeg option flags to work out until I'm entirely satisfied with the output of my videos.

According to a recent Engadget article Microsoft may consider opening a retail space similar to the Apple Store.

Of course, the reason the Apple Store exists, is because Microsoft strong-armed themselves into Wal-Mart, Sam's Club, Best Buy, Circuit City, CompUSA, Office Max, Office Depot, and every other point-of-sale retailer in the world. Those stores already look like a 'Microsoft Store' so Apple built their own. And now Microsoft wants to do the same? Their greed is incomprehensible.

Speaking of unmitigated selfishness, I want a new computer. I don't "need" one as though mine is aged and frustratingly slow, its still usable, if only by a thin thread of that definition. Just because something is not as grand as you would like it to be doesn't mean you can't use it, it just means you don't want to. It sounds better if its a need, or if you tell yourself you deserve it. If you can't pay cash for it, you really don't. So I want a new computer. I'm considering a Psystar Mac Clone. drax0r turned me on to them. "Even if they go bankrupt and stop making OSX updates, its still one hell of a x86 box." He said. Hrm...8GB of RAM and an Intel quad-core proc for $1700?

But I don't want to charge it. We're a nation of consumers on a rampant spree of self-indulgence. And to temper that, our new president wants to take my money and give it to you. I'm sorry, but you don't deserve my money either. My family and I are the only ones who've made sacrifices along the way to scratch out an existence on this planet while the rest of you have mocked me for my frugality and hard work. Its time for you to go fuck yourself. The reason I cannot afford to help you is because I don't qualify for any assistance programs, ergo, I've become your tax base. And because I'm your tax base, I'm one paycheck away from being homeless so you can endure relative comfort without being expected to work. I'm one paycheck away from poverty, because you destroyed my retirement when you cratered the economy with your greed.

I am no different than any of those bloated cows out there though. The critical eye I have for others inspects me as well. My daily consumption consists of a $3 can of Monster (200 calories), a $3 can of moist tobacco, a $6 made-to-order omlette, hashbrown & gravy breakfast (2800 calories), and a $6 made-to-order taco bowl (2800 calories). $18 and fifty-eight hundred calories daily. $360 a month. I was wrong in thinking I was going to hit the Bowflex during my 2-week Christmas Break. I do FANTASTIC on a routine. Not so much when every day was filled with trying to break yesterday's record of how long I could stay in bed or dreaming up new and interesting ways to abuse myself. Now that we're back on schedule, everything seems to be smoothing out. So I've turned over a new leaf.

NO daily Monster, NO daily snuff, and I've found that a container of yogurt before I leave the house, a container of oatmeal about an hour into work, and a $.99 side-salad topped with a pouch of tuna, while not tasting as good, is certainly adequate for my work day. This is one fourth the cost, and one tenth the calories.

I'll have enough for my new computer, in cash, in six months.


catttitude at 2009-01-15 18:26 (UTC) (Link)
Angry much.

I would love to get you that computer in about 6 months.
ehowton at 2009-01-15 18:34 (UTC) (Link)
Hrm. It does come off as a bit self-righteous doesn't it? What a hypocritical ass I am! Maybe I need to join danzigfried in the Rehabilitation Cube?
CeltManX, Devlin O' Coileáin
celtmanx at 2009-01-17 00:34 (UTC) (Link)
Yes, but we still love you anyway!!!
ehowton at 2009-01-17 01:00 (UTC) (Link)
We're having my son's birthday party the same weekend as your son, and spending the weekend in Boyd after that. Perhaps next time?
drax0r at 2009-01-15 18:41 (UTC) (Link)
I'll have enough for my new computer, in cash, in six months.

I hope Psystar are still in business in 6 months.
ehowton at 2009-01-15 19:56 (UTC) (Link)
If not, I may try to consume 180 cans of Monster & Grizzly in one sitting.
thesweetestnote at 2009-01-15 20:05 (UTC) (Link)
OMG! LMAO!! "...maximum setting" My eyes are still tearing from the hard laugh I had to overcome. Whew!

And I say VIVA LA MAC!!! My next computer purchase will certainly be a Mac. My PC is pushing 93 in computer years and with XP out and Vista in... my choice has been made.

I myself I am forcing myself into the Weight Rehab Cube today! The Marlboro lights are next. lol... "new and interesting ways to abuse myself" Funny how that never gets boring. If I could only put that energy into writing an album... I might get somewhere.

And now, I raise a toast to my fellow "one paycheck away from ruin" bloated cows.... 'a HUGE fuck off to the crater laying lazy and irresponsible!' CHEERS!!!

:) in a good way of course

ehowton at 2009-01-15 20:21 (UTC) (Link)
Of course!
Melancthe the Woe, So-Called
melancthe at 2009-01-15 20:09 (UTC) (Link)
"What a lovely world it is where kittens can sit in hats." LOL.

Okay, that settles it. I have to go snurch episodes somewhere!
ehowton at 2009-01-15 20:22 (UTC) (Link)
He needed rehabilitating.
thesweetestnote at 2009-01-15 22:08 (UTC) (Link)
Where would one acquire such delicious English entertainment?
ehowton at 2009-01-17 00:56 (UTC) (Link)
Alas, they're not for sale in the US :( Bittorrent, perhaps?
danzigfried at 2009-01-17 15:53 (UTC) (Link)
Yup...bittorrent is the way to go....unless you had an ftp site to upload them to. If that were the case I could send them to you, otherwise, just search the torrents for Hyperdrive. BTW, there are only two seasons (i.e. 12 episodes).
CeltManX, Devlin O' Coileáin
celtmanx at 2009-01-16 07:03 (UTC) (Link)
"I'll have enough for my new computer, in cash, in six months."

No, you won't my friend. I'm sorry to burst your bubble, but our new president will have spent it all already on all those lazy asses who refuse to work, cloth or feed themselves that voted for him!!!
ehowton at 2009-01-16 15:35 (UTC) (Link)
You may be right.
CeltManX, Devlin O' Coileáin
celtmanx at 2009-01-16 18:06 (UTC) (Link)
They'll come at you sideways. It's how they think. It's how they move. Sidle up and smile. Hit you where you're weak. Sort of man they're like to send believes hard. Kills and never asks why.

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