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My Cock

The Year of the Cock

Posted on 2009.11.20 at 13:00
Current Location: 75070
Current Music: Snow - Millennium (Disc 2)
Tags: ,

There's a joke going around the internet. And by "internet" I mean I've seen this come across email, Facebook, Twitter, LiveJournal...People who ship tweets to Livejournal, people who cross-post from LiveJournal to Facebook and vice-versa and people who "understand what social networking means" by posting identical content to all three simultaneously!

3 years ago, Chinese calendar year of the cow... Mad Cow disease.
2 years ago, Chinese calendar year of the bird... Avian flu.
This year, Chinese calendar year of the pig... Swine flu.

Next year is the year of the cock...Anybody else worried?

I was born in 1969 - The Year of the Cock. According to the 10th symbol of the Chinese zodiac, I am "highly motivated and hard-working; traits that enable most Roosters to have successful careers" with my fault being, "blunt with others out of honesty."

More specifically, the year of my birth places me amongst the "Earth" Roosters which can cause animosity amongst others who aren't following my standards of being motivated by success.

Problem is, this is the Year of the Ox.

There is no Year of the Bird, excepting the Rooster.

And next year is the Year of the Tiger.

I was eating lunch with my co-workers at a Chinese buffet when I cracked open my fortune cookie, turned to the girl sitting next to me, and smiled. "I had no idea that it was you all along." I told her. I smiled warmly and explained that I had hopes, and dreams, and desires and she would fulfill them all:

Stop searching forever. Happiness is just next to you.


"Here's my thing..."

In the Millennium universe, the Millennium Group's members are divided into two beliefs, the Owls and the Roosters.
The Owls claim is that six billion years ago, before the formation of the Earth, two neutron stars collided six billion light years away. This collision released cosmic rays, particles of such extreme energy, that the collision of these particles could transform the vacuum of space and cause a tear in the fabric of our universe. The Owls claims to have proof, that this tear, this expanding cosmic bubble, will reach our solar system sometime within the first century of the new millennium, creating a new universe, in which the Owls will rule.

The Roosters believe that a religious apocalyptic event will occur at the dawning of the new Millennium.



Comments:


Samantha
thesweetestnote at 2009-11-20 19:37 (UTC) (Link)
I am Wood Rabbit. Nice to meet you Earth Cock.

There is definitely a lot of cock talk coming from you :)
ehowton
ehowton at 2009-11-20 19:39 (UTC) (Link)
heh - you said, "wood."
Samantha
thesweetestnote at 2009-11-20 19:45 (UTC) (Link)
huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh.... wood...

Positive: The Rabbit can be sensitive, tactful. home-loving, refined, prudent, discreet, long-living, ambitious, cultured, well-mannered, artistic, considerate, scholarly, suave, graciously hospitable, modest and unimpeachably virtuous.

Negative: The Rabbit can also be snobbish, secretive, pedantic, complicated, haughtily indifferent, self-indulgent, hypochondriacal, punctilious, judgemental, self-righteous, deceptive, self-centred and terminally condescending
ehowton
ehowton at 2009-11-20 19:59 (UTC) (Link)
That's so accurate its scary!
Samantha
thesweetestnote at 2009-11-20 20:21 (UTC) (Link)
I immediately thought..."Ralph Lauren" ;P
ehowton
ehowton at 2009-11-20 20:38 (UTC) (Link)
I wish at times I were less excessive than I am. Or at least less particular. Other times those things are my saving grace. That's about as close to 'balance' as I get :P
Samantha
thesweetestnote at 2009-11-20 23:20 (UTC) (Link)
Balance is good.
Lelf Treperra
ubet_cha at 2009-11-20 20:27 (UTC) (Link)
Hah. I was wondering when people would actually look.
ehowton
ehowton at 2009-11-20 20:37 (UTC) (Link)
2017 is my year. I'll be 48. I'll likely ascend to a higher plane of existence.
Lelf Treperra
ubet_cha at 2009-11-20 20:58 (UTC) (Link)
I'm ordering my " Prostates don't last forever." bumper sticker that year.
ehowton
ehowton at 2009-11-20 21:50 (UTC) (Link)
I'm hoping for firmware upgrade on those things by then.
Tomas Gallucci
schpydurx at 2009-11-20 22:54 (UTC) (Link)
I always knew you were a dick.
irulan_amy at 2009-11-21 21:10 (UTC) (Link)
I was born in 1981, also the Year of the Cock. So many jokes...so little time. I'm saving them all for 2017.
ehowton
ehowton at 2009-11-27 19:03 (UTC) (Link)
Good plan. 48 years old sounds as surreal to me as 40 does now though :P
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