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Mr. Incredible

Nom de guerre

Posted on 2010.07.14 at 01:30
Current Location: 75409
Current Music: Bye Bye Birdie
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"Well, Roberts had grown so rich, he wanted to retire. He took me to his cabin and he told me his secret. 'I am not the Dread Pirate Roberts', he said. 'My name is Ryan; I inherited the ship from the previous Dread Pirate Roberts, just as you will inherit it from me. The man I inherited it from is not the real Dread Pirate Roberts either. His name was Cummerbund. The real Roberts has been retired fifteen years and living like a king in Patagonia.'"

Enumerating all the reasons we're upgrading our colo'd server to CentOS 5 is an entry in and of itself, and some of those reasons were touched on in this entry (some restrictions apply). But this post isn't about new servers or new operating systems. Its about The Anna Avenger and the passing of the torch Dread Pirate Roberts style!

The culmination of these events are inconsequential - suffice it to say an ALL!POWERFUL entity was roused into action leaving behind a wake of terrible destruction before it subsided (or was subdued - reports conflict).

My mind works in very mysterious ways. Cue a screencap I took of the The Cell. My end product is almost never how it begins. So much so that sometimes its not even close to the same project. Oftentimes this is a good thing, and I marvel at my good fortune. Other times however, its a disaster and I trash it rather than even hint at my immeasurable failure.

Given that we're upgrading many things, it was required that I skin the updated SMF for the swing. And I changed out the logo we use on our page from this to this. Some people (me) found it brilliant, and hysterical, and a step in the right direction solidifying a leader in the uprising of a local hometown hero. There was no single better way to represent what it is drax0r and I do while simultaneously looking toward the future than what that image encapsulates.

ALL!POWERFUL felt otherwise, and I respect that. My actions prove that respect.

I did the only thing I could do: I created a Nom de guerre in the style of the Dread Pirate Roberts as a backstory and stepped into those gigantic shoes, feeling a lot like this.

I shaved my beard, and for the first time since 1990...shaved my *gulp* mustache. Its now a single, thin-line now. A pencil mustache. I donned the purple satin bandanna I'd worn at the Pirate Party and fashioned a do-rag from it. When my children came home that day they stared at me in disbelief and asked, "Why are you dressed like that?" I said to them,

"Children. Its time you knew. Your father is a superhero."

And I explained how drax0r had passed the torch, so that Anna could always be protected.

drax0r sir, I relieve you.



Comments:


Tomas Gallucci
schpydurx at 2010-07-14 12:43 (UTC) (Link)
I don't want to ruin the magic here, but I do have a point of order I would like to raise. If the new Anna Avenger is sporting the pencil thin mustache that you so glibly wrote about, I see a goatee rather than just a mustache.

You've done this before; I remember the picture of you in your car where you had shaved via Photoshop because you wanted to see what you would look like. This post had a picture of you driving in your car. Perhaps you had already shaved and it was a before and after post. I couldn't find that post, but I did find this comment in which you admitted shaving your beard.

The reason I am making such a big deal on this point is that when I read this post the first time, what I heard in my head was that you had shaved not only your beard but your mustache. I was expecting to see you clean shaven with only a "pencil thin mustache."

But the image of the new Anna Avenger did not matching the word-picture you had painted.

Perhaps it is too early in the morning. Indeed I haven't had my coffee yet. But I am going to such lengths to make my point because I care about your writing and want to help you hone the craft.

Perhaps you'll have a look at this post from a technical writing perspective and see if the final product could have been tighter?
Tomas Gallucci
schpydurx at 2010-07-14 15:52 (UTC) (Link)
Yes, that was the post I was looking for; thanks. Commentary on the rest of my comment?
ehowton
ehowton at 2010-07-14 16:54 (UTC) (Link)
Absolutely. My answer is I don't have the first damn clue. Maybe he was an early riser and liked to pack in the morning. And maybe he didn't have any friends. I'm an educated man, but I'm afraid I can't speak intelligently about the travel habits of William Santiago. What I do know is that he was set to leave the base at 0600.

It seems clear to me that my lack of a more accurate description didn't mesh with your expectations.
kat_rowe
kat_rowe at 2010-07-14 17:43 (UTC) (Link)
The world needs more superheroes. Also:



ehowton
ehowton at 2010-07-14 18:19 (UTC) (Link)
The world needs more superheroes

Kick-Ass.
Samantha
thesweetestnote at 2010-07-14 18:46 (UTC) (Link)
When I was 14 and a HUGE Batfan... my buddy and I patrolled our neighborhood at night for evil doers. We looked more ninja than superhero. Our first night out: A damsel in distress! Upon our investigation we were told that her boyfriend was getting beat down by her ex...we ran to his rescue to find her ex was King Kong...we assessed the situation carefully as her boyfriend got stomped to sleep. We heard sirens and figured our help would not be needed anymore and off we went to find our next adventure.

The next night we retired our capes after getting shot at by "friends" who thought we were from a rival gang. You see, my sidekick's older brother was in the neighborhood gang....so we felt secure as we felt we had backup in our neighborhood...a case of friendly fire that could have went sooooo wrong.
ehowton
ehowton at 2010-07-14 19:02 (UTC) (Link)
No matter how many times you save the world, it always manages to get back in jeopardy again. Sometimes I just want it to stay saved! You know, for a little bit? I feel like the maid; I just cleaned up this mess! Can we keep it clean for... for ten minutes!
Samantha
thesweetestnote at 2010-07-14 18:31 (UTC) (Link)
I do not envy you the headache you will have when you awake. But for now, rest well and dream of large women.
ehowton
ehowton at 2010-07-14 19:32 (UTC) (Link)
I was thinking of how many scenarios that statement could actually apply to.
Michelle1963
michelle1963 at 2010-07-14 19:08 (UTC) (Link)
Que'? No comprendo mi primo. :-)
ehowton
ehowton at 2010-07-14 19:32 (UTC) (Link)
Its a long and multi-faceted story indeed.
CeltManX, Devlin O' Coileáin
celtmanx at 2010-07-15 00:26 (UTC) (Link)
Some how it always is!!!
CeltManX, Devlin O' Coileáin
celtmanx at 2010-07-15 00:35 (UTC) (Link)
In a totally unrelated topic. I was on class mates.com the other day and I found Carrie Fisher. According to her profile her eldest daughter graduated from high school in 1997. A year early, she states. Was she pregnant when we graduated from 8th grade by any chance??? Or did she have the baby before Edison which seems more probable. Them girls must mature early out there in Seagoville.
ehowton
ehowton at 2010-07-15 02:48 (UTC) (Link)
Wow. I'm pretty sure I have a picture of us together somewhere here in the house.
CeltManX, Devlin O' Coileáin
celtmanx at 2010-07-15 03:22 (UTC) (Link)
Before or after she got pregnant???
Samantha
thesweetestnote at 2010-07-15 02:54 (UTC) (Link)
I was on class mates.com the other day and I found Carrie Fisher

LEIA!?!?!??!
ehowton
ehowton at 2010-07-15 02:58 (UTC) (Link)
BUAHHAHAHAHAHA!
CeltManX, Devlin O' Coileáin
celtmanx at 2010-07-15 03:21 (UTC) (Link)
No, it is a different Carrie Fisher. Not as hot and part of the snooty Montessoritard class.
irulan_amy at 2010-07-15 04:17 (UTC) (Link)
I appreciate and applaud that you have chosen the color purple for your official hero color.
ehowton
ehowton at 2010-07-15 04:21 (UTC) (Link)
Well...those are the kinda,sorta high school colors. I just wanted to make it a little different from O.G. AA for differentiation purposes:

ehowton
ehowton at 2010-07-15 04:49 (UTC) (Link)
Sometimes a man, he wear stretchy pants.
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