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My God

Posted on 2010.07.22 at 14:45
Current Location: 75070
Current Music: Desplat - New Moon
Tags: , ,

My God is a brilliant statistician and the greatest anthropologist who ever existed
His vast accumulation of data proves His word has been perverted over a millena of word-of-mouth
It would therefore be foolish for us to accept Him on faith alone.

My God is a masterful philosopher who created sentience and cognition
His immeasurable depth of knowledge has proven mankind is incapable of understanding His will
Seek therefore if you must in respectful silence; thou shalt not proselytize.

My God is omnipotent - were he to speak to me he wouldn't hide his visage in a cheese sandwich
He has the magnificent self-given ability to present Himself to me unequivocally
And not lay upon me the burden to prove his existence to you based on my own experience.

My God is a benevolent God who frowns upon those who preach eternal damnation
His ages of ageless time-passing mock our feeble attempts to conceptualize His astronomic existence
His sadness of our hate and ignorance is eclipsed only by those who mask self-righteousness with humility.
My God puts the souls of angels in kittens and in puppies, too
They watch over us, these keepers of universal balance
Our comforters, at the ready - day and night
My God has filled the sky with a symphony of color and sound and done everything in His power to arm me with the tools I need to be happy and succeed and has turned me loose in this world with His protectors by my side.

Everything else is up to me.


pgrtop at 2010-07-22 20:40 (UTC) (Link)
Aho! Mitakuye Oyasin!
ehowton at 2010-07-22 22:44 (UTC) (Link)
Thank you.
thesweetestnote at 2010-07-22 20:55 (UTC) (Link)
Howtonisum! I like it! Do I have to get re-baptized or re-circumcised to join? Any commandments? ':P
ehowton at 2010-07-22 22:47 (UTC) (Link)
Thou shalt party like its 1999.
thesweetestnote at 2010-07-23 00:04 (UTC) (Link)
thesweetestnote at 2010-07-23 00:04 (UTC) (Link)
thesweetestnote at 2010-07-23 00:05 (UTC) (Link)
thesweetestnote at 2010-07-23 00:06 (UTC) (Link)
chocolatepuzzle at 2010-07-22 21:53 (UTC) (Link)
My God is a benevolent God who frowns upon those who preach eternal damnation - I hope others share this perspective as well.

Anyhow, sign me up for the church of Howtonism! :D
ehowton at 2010-07-22 23:08 (UTC) (Link)
Its almost always only churches who preach exclusivity :(
ehowton at 2010-07-23 03:11 (UTC) (Link)
Have you seen this? It came across a dictionary.com link of all place. I couldn't believe it - The Restored Church of God: http://www.thercg.org/home.html
(Anonymous) at 2010-07-23 03:27 (UTC) (Link)
Restored...wtf? made me laugh though. My mother, her mother, and my sisters still go to offshoots, Global CoG or something to that effect.

I personally have a real problem with exclusiveness in the sense that it is some action that the believer must do. The Bible talks of exclusiveness only in the sense of predestination. Of which I am a fan, seeing that a perfect god would be a god who knew, or even better, had predestined. (ie. not by some personal choice or action on the part of the individual, such ideas are Not consistent with the rest of the Bible.)

As for hell, the Bible states little about it's duration, and it is very hard to draw conclusions based on text alone. But most importantly.... no one who's ever been there has ever come back to give an account. Save, maybe Dante :) ...but I digress

michelle1963 at 2010-07-22 22:13 (UTC) (Link)
She; not "he".
ehowton at 2010-07-22 22:41 (UTC) (Link)
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