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Hemlock Grove

Posted on 2013.04.25 at 00:00
Current Location: 67114

I once made the comment, "Had Bella been topless as much as Jacob [in the Twilight films] I would have appreciated the movies far more." Hemlock Grove (TV-MA) managed to replace all that emo self-reflection in the Twilight saga...with cunnilingus. No, I'm not kidding. Think of every scene in Twilight where a protagonist was faced with a literary narrative conflict, and instead chose to resolve it with cunnilingus. Can you imagine what our world would be like if we did the same?

The only thing missing in the series was Kyle MacLachlan & Kiefer Sutherland reprising their respective roles from Twin Peaks & The Lost Boys - but it was nice seeing Battlestar Galactica's Chief Tyrol & Petty Officer Dualla working together again. And for all you Supernatural fans out there, Raphael plays...Michael!

I haven't been disappointed with either Netflix Original Series. While both offerings have been very different, they've also been very subtle in their storytelling - a welcome change.

Well, as subtle as one can be with gratuitous cunnlinugs I suppose.


dawaioser at 2013-04-25 10:38 (UTC) (Link)
I'm on episode four right now and it's growing on me. I think the Skarsgard actor is a bit of a young Christopher Walken combined with James Spader's character from "Pretty in Pink"...he's fun to watch. Although I have to say that the scene where he earned his RED WINGS, um, I can pass on that, lol.
ehowton at 2013-04-25 19:50 (UTC) (Link)
There were several scenes in the series which were so gruesome I grimaced.

That was one of them.
ehowton at 2014-07-02 19:40 (UTC) (Link)
CeltManX, Devlin O' Coileáin
celtmanx at 2013-04-25 21:58 (UTC) (Link)
You forgot the actress Famke Janssen who plays Olivia is from Star Trek: The Next Generation. How could you possibly forget her?
ehowton at 2013-04-25 22:02 (UTC) (Link)
The first time I remember seeing her was in Goldeneye. I was never really a fan of TNG.
CeltManX, Devlin O' Coileáin
celtmanx at 2013-04-25 22:09 (UTC) (Link)
She hatched from an egg and fell in love with Picard but Picard let her marry an ogre for political reasons.
ehowton at 2013-04-25 22:19 (UTC) (Link)
The way I see it, politics is a byproduct of greed. Everyone out for themselves and giving back only what they must in order to keep a majority of they believe they deserve.

Can you imagine living in such a world?
CeltManX, Devlin O' Coileáin
celtmanx at 2013-04-26 02:38 (UTC) (Link)
Sounds like Socialism.
michelle1963 at 2013-04-26 02:01 (UTC) (Link)
Cunnilingus instead of introspection? There is a type of ape - bonobos - that resolve social dilemmas with sex (they all seem quite bisexual), and they are considered to be one of the more peaceful apes. Maybe Hemlock Grove is onto something.....

Bonobos: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bonobo
ehowton at 2013-04-27 01:19 (UTC) (Link)
St. Bonobo! How's the weather up there gangly one?
dawaioser at 2013-04-27 18:43 (UTC) (Link)
Hahahaha. Aw, yeah...Bonobo monkey sex ruling the world.
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