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Posted on 2013.12.01 at 00:00
Current Location: 67114
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This is the time of year when people may tell me of their traumatic experiences with Christmas when they were growing up. When pressed it's always something like, "Grams always made the stuffing too dry," or "Hand-to-God my mom always gave me socks - for Christmas!" Its an interesting perspective.

You see, despite the fact that every scholar of Christianity is aware of the pagan origin of Christmas, in the Worldwide Church of God I was raised to believe celebrating it was the difference between life eternal and burning to death in the Lake of Fire (Revalation 20:15), and that Lucifer, the most beautiful and artistic of all the archangels - the one who practically invented freaking music (Isiah 14) - used that same skill set as Prince of the Power of the Air (Ephensians 2:2) to make Christmas Carols catchy; memorable. This way, when one got stuck in our head, we would dishonor God almost unintentionally. Not that engaging them was a one-way ticket to the Lake of Fire (though you can bet your ass we never listened to them), but more a gateway into dropping our defenses which would open us up to being susceptible to other evil persuasions.

So I've got that going for me. Growing up believing Satan invented Christmas Carols to lure us to our eternal deaths. I'm sorry Grams' stuffing was too dry.

Anyway, unlike my last two Xmas mixes, this one is a harbinger of the seedy underpinnings of the holiday season; the inverse of all that cheer. What we may suppose those who've hit rock bottom on the most joyous of days must hear as they seek a reason to trudge onward one more day. Those who are inclined to do so can blame Satan for that as well I suppose. But you can thank suzanne1945 for this one. She had gone on some trippy, hippy convention (as she is wont to do) and ran across this dude who plays a freaking Chapman Stick, which is another way to say, "creepy guitar." Well, I suppose its not creepy if you aren't trying to summon the undead with Away in a Manger, which suddenly sounds like the worst Christmas Lullaby ever. I played it for my kids and they hugged themselves, sat down and started crying. And I've never heard Julie Andrews sound so wrist-slashy. So yeah, I'm starting to finally connect the dots between Satan and Christmas carols.

May the Force be with you.


  1. ***Minor Night*** Xmas ed (ID: 196325)

  2. A Minor Christmas Medley

  3. O Tannenbaum
    • "A Dave Brubeck Christmas" (Telarc Label)
      • Dave Brubeck

  4. Carol of the Bells

  5. Away In a Manger
    • "Heavenly Peace"
      • Trevor Stewart

  6. What Child Is This?
    • "Christmas with Julie Andrews"
      • Julie Andrews

  7. Twisted Reindeer Ride
    • "Twisted Christmas"
      • Mark Russell

  8. Let All Mortal Flesh Keep Silence
    • "Angels and Saints At Ephesus"
      • Benedictines Of Mary, Queen Of Apostles

  9. Gregorian Hymn
    • "Winter's Knight"
      • Nox Arcana

  10. Sweeter The Bells
    • "Christmas Chants"
      • Gregorian

  11. Angels We Have Heard On High
    • "Ambient Holidays Volume 1: Christmas Ambient"
      • Ken Elkinson

  12. O Come, O Come, Emmanuel
    • "And Winter Came..."
      • Enya

  13. The Snowman (From the Original Score for the Animated Special "the Snowman")
    • "Christmas at the Cinema - Themes from Your Favorite Holiday Film and TV Classics"
      • Dan Redfeld & Elizabeth Hedman

  14. Merry Christmas Darling
    • "Christmas Portrait (The Special Edition)"
      • Carpenters

  15. Christmastime
    • "December"
      • Scala & Kolacny Brothers

  16. We Wish You a Scary Christmas
    • "Gothic Christmas"
      • Count Bachula

  17. The Coventry Carol
    • "The American Boychoir: Carol"
      • The American Boychoir

  18. Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas
    • (EP)
      • Digital Daggers

  19. (Another) Christmas Without Snow
    • (EP)
      • Lola Dutronic


pcofwildthings at 2013-12-01 15:23 (UTC) (Link)
Well, after that intro (which made me laugh out loud in paragraph 3) I was expecting something else. You know, I've made the comment to various people that if you ever want to drive me insane, just lock me in a room and play Sarah McLaughlin or Enya music 24/7. (It would not take 24 hours, much less 7 days for insanity to ensue, I'm fairly certain. Contemporary country music may do the job just as effectively.) I sampled your mix. It is obvious you really put a lot of thought and time into it, and, like the aforementioned musicians, some people are going to love it. I have an odd relationship with Christmas music. I loved it, in season, for about four and a half decades. Then it gradually made me want to poke my eardrums. And yet, I can be in a shopping center and mindlessly find myself humming along to Good King Wenceslas. What is up with that, I do not know.
ehowton at 2013-12-01 22:00 (UTC) (Link)
Divination may hold the answer to those bold enough to press up against the dogmatic membrane outlawing such. I'll see you in hell.
michelle1963 at 2013-12-02 00:07 (UTC) (Link)
And yet, I can be in a shopping center and mindlessly find myself humming along to Good King Wenceslas. What is up with that, I do not know.

According to Wide World Church of God, it's the work of Lucifer, ya know. :p
michelle1963 at 2013-12-02 00:08 (UTC) (Link)
It's a great mix! I suppose for those who like their Christmas music with a very traditional bent, it might be bleak. I found it to be, just right. :)
ehowton at 2013-12-02 00:28 (UTC) (Link)
The fact that you find this single-instrument, downtempo, minor-chord music so fitting may be telling about your mental health current outlook on life.

Just an idea.
(Anonymous) at 2013-12-04 02:53 (UTC) (Link)


Thanks for including us on your Bleak Xmas comp! :-)

best wishes

Richard Citroen
ehowton at 2013-12-04 03:19 (UTC) (Link)

Re: Christmas!

How cool! You guys totally nail it.
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