I shouldn't blog when I'm exhausted, stressed, and mentally drained. I took a couple of days vacation to accomplish some things outside of work. What ended up happening was I did all of those things, and worked. Ergo, both suffered. That's a hell of way to do things. So I've worked myself to exhaustion to meet a suspense with a half-assed final product. I am not infallible. Poor galinda822 rec'd most of the brunt of the explosion as my backup at work - a position she herself held prior to my arrival, and one she performs now with extreme prejudice. Nothing's going right at work, the house of cards we've put in place as a support infrastructure is falling around us, and our client is making unreasonable demands with wild accusations backed by exaggerated claims. But, they are the client. I say, "Yes ma'am." and press on. I've run out of excuses for things missed. We're all giving 110% at work, there's just not enough people to go around. What we accomplish on a daily basis is nothing short of miraculous...but all the client sees are opportunities to poke at the fragile cracks of missed items. Some of the accusations are true, of course. We miss things. Items which are important - and I personally am unable to respond to so many requests in a timely manner. Its very taxing.
My boss is in town this week while I am gone. He's seen first hand the sheer number of requests above and beyond our standard fair. In fact, all week that I've been gone we've had back-to-back emergencies on an unprecedented scale he's personally witnessed. I don't know if this is good for me, or bad for me. The Site Service Delivery Manager is usually the first person to be relieved of duty when these types of things take place at this scale. I'm under no preconception that my job is secure. I came here because my boss asked me to, and I support him 100%. Always have, always will. This may be the time he actually asks me to step down from my role. I'm okay with that, as I anticipated it prior to taking on this responsibility.
That doesn't make any of this easier.