ehowton (ehowton) wrote,
ehowton
ehowton

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Land Speed Record

Although this may be difficult for some of you to believe, the following account is true:

I left work at I-20 & 35W at 1800, and never made it over 25mph for a full 15 minutes. After that, however, I accelerated up to 85mph, and kept that poor car at 3/4 throttle. From work to I-45 is 40 miles, and from I-45 to Tony's is another 20. Not just any 20 miles, though, 20 miles through the 75 Central Expressway corridor! I was able to maintain 80mph+ through 75! At this point, traffic came to a standstill, so I veered off to 635 East...which was at a standstill just at the Greenville exit (which I took) and arrived at Tony's at 1700. A new record. I figure, with the initial fifteen minutes of traffic, I made it 60 miles across the Metroplex and though Downtown Dallas in just over 45 minutes!

Now then, a few things I'd like to say concerning that little jaunt:


  1. GET YOUR BUSTED-ASS RICE BURNER OUT OF THE LEFT HAND LANE!

  2. SPINNERS MAKE YOU LOOK STUPID - GET OUT OF THE LEFT HAND LANE!

  3. If you cannot talk on your cell phone and drive simultaneously, fine, just GET OUT OF THE LEFT HAND LANE!

  4. My used car was $8900, your new Euro-sedan was $70,000. Fantastic. Now GET THE FSCK OUT OF THE LEFT HAND LANE!

  5. If you're in the left hand lane, and some idiot is driving up behind you at 85 mph - GET OUT OF THEIR WAY!



Seriously, I could not believe how many greenish ToyotaHondas were just parked in the left hand lane, driven mostly my minorities, soaking up the negative attention. One woman (sorry ladies) was doing a good 75mph until she got on her phone. Instead of moving over or maintaining velocity, she slowed to a crawl in the left hand lane. Now, let's turn this around on me, ok? I'm going to type this very slowly so you can understand. If I am in the left hand lane driving 90mph, and some asshole comes up behind me at 135mph, I'm going to GET OUT OF HIS WAY.

Oh well. What are you going to do. There's more Indians in Dallas now than Texans. Maybe I'll move to Goa.
Tags: driving
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